I bought this t-shirt a while ago for working out. It came with the phrase “I’ve seen some weird sh*t” written on it (without the censorship of course 😉). Due to my gym being a public facility where children and families are present, I didn’t feel as if it were an appropriate phrase to have displayed on my t-shirt so I painted over it in white. I felt like it lost some of its meaning when I did so however, so today while working the art room, I added my own revised phrase.
It may seem silly, but I have seen weird things and I can’t un-see them. I feel like I’m constantly walking a tight rope between spirituality and insanity, but I’m learning to be okay with that. I’m learning that I can deep dive into Wonderland yet return to reality at the drop of a hat.
My last psychosis opened my eyes in ways I never dreamed possible. I gained hope for myself and for all life on this planet. I began to believe that I could heal, that my diagnosis of mental illness didn’t have to be a life sentence. I’m grateful I can impart some of what I’ve learned with all of you, by continuing to weave the magic of hope into my public speaking, art, poetry, and writing.
Tonight’s been a tad melancholy again but waves are a part of life. I need both the rain and the sunshine to grow. I’m grateful to be where I am. When I find myself in fear, thinking reality could never be as great as my imagination, I hold onto this quote:
“One day we will find what we are looking for,… or maybe we won’t. Maybe we will find something so much greater than that.” ~Unknown
I don’t know what the future holds but I believe it’s going to be better than I can imagine.
Art of Dorothy and Alice having Tea by Helen Green
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